How to Deal with Anger – 6 Islamic Tips to Control Anger
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Publié le 15 mars 2022, par Samir | 12 h 26 min
Temps de lecture : 9 minutes
All of us get angry and express our anger in specific ways, as being angry is a natural emotion, but it comes with specific harmful outcomes. Have we pondered why we show resentment or intense reaction to certain situations and how badly it affects our mental and emotional health? These thoughts cross our minds daily, but we do not concentrate on the possible reasons and harmful outcomes of getting angry on various life matters.
Dealing with anger is not an easy issue, and it takes time to recover from this illness. Being the best religion and universal guide for all humanity, Islam has never left us unclear on how to combat anger issues and what our religion teaches us about anger.
This article will discuss and help you learn some practical ways to deal with anger and Islamic tips to control anger. By the end of this article, we are sure you would make yourself mentally relaxed by controlling your anger and not letting it affect your mental health.
What is Anger?
According to psychology, anger is a state that stems from internal discomfort and willingness to avenge something. This discomfort ignites the desire to express anger. A chaotic state takes over an angry person’s mind, and he loses control over himself and fails to make rational decisions. The angry, agitated person acts as a cave under fire within himself, and he feels powerless yet loses control over his mind and heart. He makes wrong decisions out of anger outbursts and sometimes makes horrible mistakes in a few minutes.
It’s hard to calm the affected person down and gather means to take him out of that agitated state. He cannot comprehend the good aspects and refuses to understand the talks. No advice, counseling, or pacifying efforts seem to work on that person. That individual considers all others his enemy to understand his irrational state of mind.
In His Holy Book, Al-Quran, Allah has mentioned attributes of the Muttaqeen (the God-conscious) that they possess a firm hold on their anger and control it.
« Those who spend (in Allah’s Cause) in prosperity and adversity, who repress their anger, and who pardon men, verily, Allah loves the al-Muhsinun (the good-doers). » [3:134]
Why is it Important to Control Our Anger?
Allah doesn’t like anger
Anger is the key that opens doors to all kinds of evils, and it is one of the diseases of the soul. When a person is angry, he can react calmly as taught by the Quran and described by the Holy Prophet (PBUH). It is that moment where the distressed individual could either lose control or please Satan by outbursting his anger. However, the most likable attribute before Allah is acting rationally and calming yourself down.
The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, « Anger comes from the devil, the devil was created from fire, and fire is extinguished only with water. So when one of you becomes angry, he should make wudu. »
Dealing with anger pleases Allah
Allah loves His creation; He always guides the best for humanity through His divine Book. He sent prophets for humanity to seek guidance on social, economic, religious, and personal matters. His chosen prophets dedicated their lives to the welfare and guidance of their nations.
Hence, as the most peaceful religion, Islam has drafted practical guidelines for humanity, including Muslims, to improve lives and earn Allah’s pleasure.
« Whatever ˹pleasure˺ you have been given is ˹no more than a fleeting˺ enjoyment of this worldly life. But what is with Allah is far better and more lasting for those who believe and trust in their Lord; And those who avoid the major sins and immoralities, and when they are angry, they forgive. »
Once a man came to the Messenger of Allah (s) and asked: « Advise me. » The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said:
« Do not be angry. » The man asked the same question, and he (PBUH) again said: « Do not be angry, » and continued: « He is not strong and powerful who throws people down, but he is strong who withholds himself from anger. »
6 Islamic Tips to Control Anger
Getting angry in undesirable circumstances is a natural emotion and can take over a person’s mind. Each individual faces different intensity of agitation as per their temperament. However, any extreme emotion could harm the affected person and the people around him. Hence, Islam doesn’t encourage Muslims to remain in an angry state for long. Anger can result in dire consequences and ruin a person’s life, business, and relationships.
We have compiled some beneficial tips concerning Islamic teachings that could help you control anger:
1. Deal with anger by making Dua to Allah
Allah, The Exalted, has sent His Last Prophet, Muhammad Mustafa (PBUH), for the guidance and betterment of humanity. He is a universal role model and guides all humans until this universe exists. The Holy Prophet (PBUH), in various instances, has taught his companions and followers several supplications or Dua to overcome angry emotions. One such Dua is as follows:[Text Wrapping Break]« O Allah, by Your knowledge of the unseen and Your power over creation, keep me alive so long as You know that living is good for me. And cause me to die when You know that death is better for me. O Allah, cause me to fear You in secret and in public. I ask You to make me true in a speech in times of pleasure and anger. I ask You to make me moderate in times of wealth and poverty. And I ask You for everlasting delight and joy that will never cease. I ask You to make me pleased with what You have decreed and for an easy life after death. I ask You for the sweetness of looking upon Your face and longing to meet You in a manner that does not entail a calamity that will bring about harm or a trial that will cause deviation. O Allah, beautify us with the adornment of faith and make us among those who guide and are upon the right path. » [Sunan an-Nasa’i]
2. Seek help from Allah
Anger is the tool of Satan, who aims to misguide Muslims all the time. But Allah has promised Muslims that He would never let Satan rule over His creation. The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) has advised Muslims to recite “A’udhu Billahi Minash’ Shaitan nir-Rajim” each time we feel that we are going through angry moments. Its translation is as follows:
“I seek refuge with Allah from Satan, the accursed.”
3. Move Your State
Another practical advice and Islamic tip for dealing with anger are as simple as changing your state. While you are in distress or angry, sit down if you are standing. Similarly, if you are angry and seated, leave your place and stand up.
“If any of you becomes angry and he is standing, let him sit down, so his anger will go away; if it does not go away, let him lie down.” (Hadith)
4. Go Quiet
The beloved Prophet of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said as reported by Imam Ahmed:
« If any of you becomes angry, let him keep silent. »
(Al-Musnad, 1/329, Saheeh al-Jaami, 693, 4027)[Text Wrapping Break]When we go through anger, we lose power in our minds and utter inappropriate words. Hence, Islamic teachings advise us to stay quiet if any such situation occurs. It is not a good Muslim attribute to use derogatory words when angry. This condition could damage his relationship, peace of mind, and mental health.
The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said: « The strong man is not the one who can overpower others (in wrestling); rather, the strong man is the one who controls himself when he gets angry. » (Narrated by Ahmad, 2/236)
5. Change Your Mind and do Wudhu (ablution)
The Holy Prophet (PBUH) said, “Anger comes from Satan, Satan was created from fire, and fire is extinguished only with water; so when any of you is angry, he should perform ablution.”
Try to keep yourself engaged in some constructive task rather than expressing your anguish for hours. It would not benefit you; instead, it builds up feelings of revenge and hatred for the angry person. Perform ablution (Wudhu) and shift your focus to something positive. Wudhu has immense benefits, and as mentioned above, the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) has also advised Muslims to keep a habit of making Wudhu during an angry state.
6. Remind Yourself of the Benefits of Controlling Anger
When we succeed in dealing with our anger, the fruit is patience. Islam has put a strong emphasis on controlling anger and keeping quiet during difficult situations. Simultaneously, Islam also teaches us to practice patience and forbearance. It is easy to initiate a quarrel, but it takes a considerable effort to calm things down and offer reconciliation.
One of the ahadith on dealing with anger states that:
“No one has swallowed back anything more excellent in the sight of Allah than the anger he restrains, seeking to please Allah.” (Ibn Majah)
Indeed, Allah is The Most Forgiving, and He loves those who stay patient. He has given the news of Jannah to Muslims who are quick to forgive others and control their angry emotions. Now, as Muslims, it is upon us to obey Allah’s commandments and simplify our lives by following His words and controlling our extreme emotions.
“And whoever avenges himself after having been wronged – those have not upon them any cause [for blame. And the retribution for an evil act is an evil one like it, but whoever pardons and makes reconciliation – his reward is [due] from Allah. Indeed, He does not like wrongdoers.” (42:40-41)
Allah’s last Messenger, Muhammad (peace be upon him), said: “He who gave up disputing while he is right, a palace of high rank in Paradise will be built for him. He who gave up disputing while he is a fabricator, a palace in the center of Paradise will be built for him.” (Al-Tirmidhi)
The above guidelines show that Islam offers numerous ways for Muslims to deal with anger and lead peaceful life. Anger begins with stupidity and ends on resentment; hence our religion forbids us to get under stressful situations and express anger. However, anger, revenge, hatred; all are human emotions, and a person tends to experience challenging psychological situations.
But we are blessed to have a beautiful religion that offers a complete code of life and practical advice on encountering difficult emotions. As practicing Muslims, we must control our feelings and remain calm if someone wrongs us or hurts our feelings. Indeed, Allah loves those who are forgiving and gentle towards other Muslims. He has set great rewards for His faithful believers and promised Jannah on the Day of Resurrection.
The Holy Prophet, Hazrat Muhammad (PBUH), said to a man when he asked:
“Do not get angry; then Paradise is for you.”
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